You’re On Candid Camera

I’ve been tempted all day to practice handstands in the hallway here at work. I’m conveniently wearing jeans and Converse — and when everyone is trapped in meeting rooms like they are now, there’s very little foot traffic out there. Tucked between the elevators and the back hallway is a Mel-sized nook. There are no direct sight lines to it, so if I was really good and vertical, I could be doing a handstand there and the only way someone could see me would be if they were directly in front of me. I’d be hidden from people walking down the hall and getting into the elevator.

How can I resist that?

On my last lap around to scope it out, I decided to give it a go.

Hands on the floor, feet up the wall, tucking my head in line, just about to start walking my hands in to be more vertical…

when I heard someone coming.

I scampered my feet back down and got upright just in time.

Ugh. It was this guy from the other side of the office with tragically bad hair who never, ever, ever says hello, even if we’re the only people in the hall. I kinda wish I’d still been upside down when he rounded the corner just to give him a legitimate reason to avoid me.

On my way back to my desk, I remembered the cameras.

A few months ago, our corporate overlords required us to install ID card readers on all the doors, so whenever we go out to the bathroom or the elevator or take a short cut to another wing of the office, we have to swipe our cards.

And along with the cards? Cameras in every hallway.

Someone in the Pacific Northwest may have just seen my almost-handstand.

Hope they enjoyed it.

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