I Won’t Eat Cake. I Can’t Do Math. Today’s Grade: U for Unsatisfactory

I Won’t Eat Cake.
I’m sitting in a conference room with my project team, watching them eat chocolate birthday cake (with chocolate ganache!), and trying to convince myself that in an hour, when I eat cucumber, snap peas, green peppers, black olives, and sardines, I will be glad.


And again I say, harumph!

I can’t even have one bite of cake today because I’ve already strayed from my October Cleanup path.

Yes, I did. Let’s all pause a moment and think about that.

Last Saturday, I went to a wedding, drank wine (too much), ate vegetarian appetizers that were the only food available (they were also delicious and included grains… and I’d planned to bring sardines just in case but then I didn’t so I only have myself to blame…), and ate a big piece of chocolate wedding cake.

I did. I ate shrimp dumplings and chocolate cake last Saturday.

So yeah, no cake today and now I may have to continue my totally clean path until the end of November (if I want to have 30 clean days in a row).

I’m displeased with myself.

And pouting.

I Can’t Do Math.
This morning I was all excited because I thought I’d tricked myself into getting a PR on my power clean.

I started with what I thought was 55# on the bar… but it was actually 65. But I didn’t know it. When I’d finished playing around, trying to get to a 1RM, I realized I had 85# on the bar – 10 more than I thought! I failed on the 85, but… “Woot! Eighty pounds is a PR for me. Hooray!”

I swaggered through the rest of the workout.

But 80# wasn’t a PR for me. I’d already gotten an 80# PR on my power clean. In August.

I still think this was a kickass workout – I loved it! – but I’m less thrilled with myself than I was eight hours ago.

power clean
1-1-1-1-1-1 (find 1RM max)
My max: 80#

6 rounds:
5 power cleans @ 60% of max (I used 55#)
5 box jumps, 20″
My time: 6:55

Today’s Grade: U for Unsatisfactory
I’ve been working too much. I’ve been sleeping too little. I need to dye my (blonde and gray) roots and deal with my eyebrows. I need to play the piano. I need to go for a run around the lake for fun. I need to spend, like, four hours by myself and away from the computer.

I will make those things happen this weekend.

But today, I might pout some more.

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  • Mz. G says:

    Celebrate the victories (yay, no cake today! PR today!) Nobody is perfect, but every attempt to be "good" counts. I'm proud of you! And if it's any consolation, JUST as I read your post, a coworker tempted me with a cupcake. I politely declined. Even with my coworkers looking at me aghast and whining that I have to eat one because they ate one. I stayed strong. Your influence is not all for naught.

    Above all be kind to ourselves, right?

  • Melissa 'Melicious' Joulwan says:

    Mz. G! Congratulations for saying no to the cupcake — and thank you for your kind words. It's amazing to me how easy it is to stay on track, like, 90% of the time — and how one glass of wine can lead to a total food meltdown. Lesson learned: eat protein before weddings and set a 1-drink limit 😉

    (And a zero drink limit if one is supposed to be doing a Whole30 clean-up. Yeesh!)

  • Meghan says:

    Oh my gosh, I love your blog. I love it, love it, love it. 🙂 So I finished up my Whole30 3 weeks ago. I have not been a star student, but I have certainly held me own post-Whole30. Biggest weaknesses? I've been to 3 weddings with 3 delicious wedding cakes in 3 weeks. Killer. I have discovered So Delicious coconut milk "ice cream". Killer. AND peanut butter fudge 2 weeks ago. KILLER! Anybody up for a Whole30 version 3.0 when it comes out because I think I need another 30 ASAP! 🙂

  • Trixie says:

    You're naturally a blond?

  • Melissa 'Melicious' Joulwan says:

    Yes, it's true. I'm naturally blonde. Middle-of-the-road, slightly-strawberry blonde.

  • Melissa 'Melicious' Joulwan says:

    Meghan! Thank you so much! I love that you love it 😉

    I think that wedding cake is a requirement for good karma. Others might call that an "excuse" or a "rationalization" but there's something very important about celebrating love with cake at a wedding.

    I'm back on the Whole30 train until Thanksgiving. Wheeee!

  • Lyssa says:

    I love your list under your U grade … sounds a little too much like my life lately 🙂 To sleep and solo time this weekend!

  • Melissa 'Melicious' Joulwan says:

    Amen, sister. BTW, I'm loving your "nature's gym" posts!

  • Trixie says:

    Wow, never would have thought blond! While, the dark hair is quite becoming:)