Mission 17 and Heavy Lifting

This weekend, Dave and I did a little bit of a re-set on our life. All of our “extra” commitments are over. We’ve been to lots of rock shows, took two weekend trips, started recording our St. Joe’s Choir CD… now it’s time to batten down the hatches until Thanksgiving. My plan is to sleep soundly, eat cleanly, train hard, read, and play music — that’s ALL I’m doing with my free time until November 26 (when we’ll be enjoying turkey, etc. at Trio).

It’s been about five months since the official start of Mission 17, and now seemed like a good time to do a little status check, so… how’s it going?

It depends on the criteria used for judgment.

1. That damn number on the scale: No change.
I suppose given my history, maintaining my weight deserves some celebration, but I’m frustrated that I haven’t lost any L-Bs.

2. Body composition: I don’t know.
I consistently have the same coach do my body fat pinching, but we consistently get inconsistent readings. I’ve stopped paying attention to the calipers and instead rely on how my jeans fit. They fit… the same.

To inject some science into my admittedly flawed personal measurement technique, I’ve made an appointment at UT to undergo Body Comp FIT, a body scanning thingamajig (called DEXA) that measures body fat percentage and divides the body into three compartments: fat mass, bone mass, and lean mass.

SCIENCE!

3. Nutrition: Clean as a whistle.
In July, I committed to dino-chow, and I’m very glad I did. Grains are gone. Dairy is gone. Insomnia and mood swings and gnawing, “if I don’t eat something immediately I will murder someone with a ballpoint pen” hunger is gone.

I still have the occasional flash of anxiety that I’m eating too much, but generally speaking, I’m not afraid to eat. The delicious, healthy food I’m eating is pure, power-packed fuel. Neato.

I document everything in FitDay, and I weight/measure to make sure I stay within some good parameters for the day. Over the last three weeks, I’ve gone astray more times than I like, so I’m going “no-cheat” until Thanksgiving. It will be challenging, but I also know that the champagne and turkey and cornbread stuffing will taste even better if I feel like I earned the treats.

4. Training: New activities are afoot!
I think my biggest changes are happening in this bucket. For the time being, long running is out (too much cardio stress on the bod for fat loss) and heavy weight lifting is in (to build beautiful, strong, lean, fat-burning muscle). The decision to NOT run in the half marathons this year was a tough call, but I think it was the right one. For now.

Dave and I were able to join South Austin Gym for just $99 each for the year, and now I have barbells and plates and giant dumbbells at my disposal. It’s been three weeks, and so far, we’ve worked on our five rep maximum for deadlifts, back squats, shoulder press, and push pres. This week: front squats. It’s a completely different experience than the sweatastic workouts we do at CrossFit Women and Bootcamp. I can’t say yet that I like it – or that I’m very good at it yet – but I recognize the value.

5. Rest: I sleep a lot.
I’ve been consistently getting at least eight hours of sleep every night and about half the time, I get nine! There’s still an occasional bad night where I only get seven hours on the pillow, but those are becoming increasingly rare.

6. Attitude: Borderline
I’m struggling. A lot. I’m frustrated and disappointed and, if I’m really honest: angry. WHY CAN’T I LOSE WEIGHT WHEN I SEE PEOPLE AROUND ME GETTING SKINNIER ALL THE TIME?!

It makes me want to ball my hands into fists, stomp my feet, throw my head back, and roar at the sky, “It’s not fair!”

Um… no, duh. Life isn’t fair.

All I can do is keep working with my amazing support team – the CrossFit Central coaches, the supersmart Moxy-Boss, my unrelentingly supportive husband, my badass training partners – and keep noodling with my training, refining my diet, and clinging with all my might to my grizzly.

Because the alternative is unacceptable.

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Comments

  • Barbara says:

    I think you will get stronger through lifting on your own and begin to like the experience. I zone out the world when I lift…kinda blissful when it's not making me grunt outloud.

  • girlblake says:

    I love you and think you're an inspiration. Thanks for showing up every week and feeding my own desire to keep trying for more.

  • Aaron says:

    If it was easy it wouldn't be worth it right? Just think about all you've already accomplished! Then use that as motivation to stay on that grizzly! You can do it! Look at what you've already done.

  • Jen says:

    I'll join you in the "No Cheat 'Till Turkey Day" challenge! I needed something to kick me in the butt!

    You're a very strong woman and I hope you recognize that. Glad to see you haven't resorted to drastic calorie cutting to drop LB's. Given my history, that's the first thing I would have done..but seeing your strength about it makes me strong too!

  • Lita says:

    I love your blog and your honesty. I can relate to much of what you wrote, so it's nice to know I'm not alone.

  • Lita says:

    I love your blog and your honesty. I can relate to much of what you wrote, so it's nice to know I'm not alone.

  • dianem says:

    I think you look fantastic, and you are taking good care of your body. Keep up the good work!

  • Littles says:

    Great job. Let go. Let go emotionally to the scale. Know what I mean? You'll feel so much better and the weight will come off. I hope I sounded like the new age freak that I am.

  • Melicious says:

    Thank you, everyone, for your kind words and compliments. You KNOW I love those compliments 😉

    My "no cheat" commitment is going very well so far, and after yesterday's workout, I'm feeling really good.

    The scale and the fat calipers and I are in a state of detente. For today, that's good enough.

  • Team CS says:

    Everyone nailed what I wanted to say. You've got a lot of support behind you. We will support you when Mel takes a trip to "crankytown" and we will cheer when you reach new heights in your training. Never, EVER, give up. 🙂

    I miss you. 🙂

    -Carla

  • Melissa says:

    I hate to see you so frustrated and down on yourself. I'm not sure why losing weight is so important to you, (I, too, think you look great!) but I respect the fact that it's driving you nuts not to reach your goal. Hang in there – you are doing the right things and your hard work WILL pay off.

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