Internal Monologue — or Shut Up You Stupid Demon

It’s never a good sign when I put on my workout clothes, hustle my butt to wherever that day’s “storming the castle”** is supposed to start, and then sit down.

Dave looked concerned when I parked my fanny on the bench at the end of the Mopac bridge yesterday morning. “Uh, sweetie? Whatcha doing?”

I felt like I had no gas in the tank. And man, once I’ve had that thought, it’s a long climb back up to “let’s go!”

I waffled. I bargained with myself. I considered running after work. And then I decided that I would just start and see what happened. I mean, it was just three little miles. No sprinting involved. No time requirements. Just get around the loop in one piece.

So we put in our ear buds and started down the path to what we call Big Dog Woods.

It was rough. My demon was in full effect, reminding me on every step that I could just stop and walk. “Walking would feel so good. You should totally walk. You’re tired. Are you sure you’re not overtraining? W-A-L-K. You can walk. It would feel so good.”

I ignored the little fucker, but he definitely ate his Wheaties yesterday.

I made it through the first 9 minutes to the bathroom and took a little break, then wimped out at The Spiral (for the first time ever) and used the stairs instead of running up the ramp. I muddled my way across The Deck and hit the shady Other Side. Still miserable.

It continued that way for what felt like forever, but was, in fact, about 10 minutes.

Then I decided to stop being such a baby.

It was a gorgeous morning. I was out running, looking at the turtles, checking out the abs on the passing runners, and I WAS RUNNING.

I mean, WOOT!

When I got to Monster Hill, I sprinted to the top, took a sip of water at the fountain near the mini train tracks and decided to just run it in, no more mental whining, no stopping.


My overall time sucked — two minutes slower than usual — but I had an epiphany. A realization. A revelation.

The whole point of eating right and working out is to be a happy, healthy (hot-lookin’) human. So yeah, yesterday was not a star-turn on the running trail. Whatever. It was still miles in the training bank account, and I got to play outside before going to the office. (And work was much more tolerable having had my outdoor recreation time.)

Today’s workouts TOTALLY ruled. So there you have it. You gotta — I’ve gotta — just keep going. Some days I’m a superhero. Some days I’m a straggler. But the oxygen flows and the blood pumps just the same.

** Dave’s parting words when I’m headed out the door for a workout: “Have fun storming the castle.” How awesome is my husband?!

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